Hopefully, this year will be amazing! The 2010s were rocky for me, to say the least. Some really amazing moments, and some of the worst. Being sick at the end of 2019, just goes along with how that year was. I plan to post more often on here, again. I might get into vlogging on youtube. I've been meaning to try it out, but haven't gotten the guts to do it yet. I have a webcam built into my new (I still feel like it is) computer, so it should be easier than doing it on my phone. I want to get back to medically transitioning this year. I'll feel a lot better mentally, which might help me 'cope' with the other physical health stuff. I want a new primary doc, rheumatologist, etc. as well. My current primary doc misgendered me at the end of my last appointment, and made me feel awful about something else. The rheumatologist doesn't seem to know how to order lab tests, which I think is a real problem. Hopefully, I can see a dermatologist and a new gastroenterologist. Plan to do a lot of promoting my books after I republish them. (The revised versions.) Making business cards, author pages/sites, book trailers, and more. So, there's already a lot of things planned for this year.
This is my wallpaper for January. It's Zenitsu from Kimetsu no Yaiba or Demon Slayer. He's annoying at times, but when he's in battle-mode, he's pretty cool. His personality completely changes. Seems like a part of him goes to sleep. He has a lightning-based ability after being struck by a lightning bolt. It affected him so much that even his hair and eye color changed. Thought this was an interesting and elegant one. The month-long holidays for January are: National Candy Month, National Egg Month, National Hot Tea Month, National Oatmeal Month, National Soup Month. Some are for important causes, some are to make you appreciate things you may take for granted, and some are just for fun. I actually forgot to get new calendars until today. Ordered another Jewish Historical Museum one. The museum is in Amsterdam, and many of their pieces come from what was once the local Jewish community in that area. They also have some from around the world. I really like their calendars, and get them most years. Each month they feature pieces from the museum. It's also a good one to keep track of the Jewish calendar. Our calendar is mainly lunar-based, so holidays seem to change every year in relation to the 'regular' calendar. In reality, they are always the same on ours. Although, some years there are added months for a similar thing to leap years, but most of the time it's the same. The regular calendar doesn't list many of the holidays, and some of them can be inaccurate. It also has the parsha or Torah portion for each week, which is handy. I also ordered another elements calendar. I liked that this past year, so why not get it for this one. They go into a lot of detail for each element. The example pics of things with that element are interesting. I'm surprised that Amazon expects them to be here in 2 days. That's really fast. I've been sick with a nasty cold since Saturday. Maybe a little of Friday, too. Although, I just had horrible back pain then. I wonder if it was like a warning beforehand? My back still hurts, but it's not as constant or as intense. This is much worse than when I was sick right after my birthday (Nov. 7th) for a month. I had a breather for about a couple of weeks in between. My nose has been running like crazy, painfully sneezing a lot, coughing attacks, occasionally feeling like I can't breathe, sore throat, and more. It's been so bad, I've resorted to using Safeway's version of DayQuil and NyQuil. Recently started the severe version of the DayQuil, and that's been working a lot better. Using both feels like I'm drugged up a lot of the time, although the illness also makes me feel weird. I've been able to sleep lately, at least. Hopefully, I'll get over this soon. I feel like I'm putting some things on hold because of it. I might try to get at least one 2-mile walk in a day once I beat this. I'm itching to try that again. I found out recently that I have vision and dental coverage now. Wahoo! I haven't seen a dentist in roughly 14 years (since I wasn't covered), so it'll be interesting to see one now. I might shock them. Vision has been weird. I haven't really had it either. They say I might have, but couldn't access it for some reason. Supposedly, I'll still have health insurance, too. I'm a dependent on my parent's plan, and they changed to a new system that goes into effect this month. I saw that I still had coverage documents right before New Year's. Checked it again afterwards, and those documents disappeared. My card was still in their system and other things indicated I was still covered. There was no denial letter, so I'm guessing I simply have to wait and see. I have a feeling it'll take some time for everything to transfer. Makes me anxious, though. Hopefully, it'll be sorted out in the next couple of weeks, since I'll need to order meds around that time. I finished the first level of all the units in Duolingo's Scottish Gaelic course. There really wasn't much to it. I try to stick with languages for at least 3 months at a time. It was barely a month's worth when I finished it. So, I'm trying to level out all the units now. There are 5 levels or 'crowns' to each one. Almost done with the Pers. Det. (Personal Details) unit. Only 3 more units until the 1st checkpoint. There are 2 checkpoints. 3, if you count the very end as one. I don't think this will last 3 months, but it'll be better than just a month. I'm now in 8th place of the Obsidian League. There's only one more league. I don't know what that one's called. I've never gotten this far with the leagues. Finished editing the memoir. It had more errors than I expected, but still better than the others so far. The only one left is the cookbook. This should go pretty quickly. Then, I'll check the formatting of all of them. Haven't done much with drawing lately, since I haven't had the motivation with being sick. We normally go to a family friends' (they're a couple) place for New Year's Eve. The same people that host Thanksgiving dinners and Passover seders. Someone that we all knew passed away recently (I was shocked by it), and their dog has cancer (I think). A lot of things at once, so they couldn't do it this year. That's ok. We had our own party. Had snacks off and on from around dinnertime until midnight. Had chips and French onion dip, pickled herring on rosemary crackers, butterflake rolls, gelt (chocolate coins I still had/have from Hanukkah), a 'rainbow chip' (like M&M's, but smaller) cookie, hot chocolate, and sparkling apple cider. (Probably forgot a few things.) Most of it I don't have very often. Forgot that I also got white cheddar Babybel snacks to have a 'new' cheese for the new year. I haven't had that version of Babybel's cheeses. Oh well. I can have it now. Rosie seems to be back to her old self. Eating and drinking normally. As far as I know, she hasn't been throwing up. She's been incredibly loving and purring a lot. She knows I'm sick, and has been trying to help me. She's been trying to get me to eat more than usual. Kneading my legs and cuddling up close to my head, which isn't as normal. Every time I have a painful sneeze, when I'm lying down, she checks out my nose. Cute and annoying at the same time. Tasha's even been more loving towards me lately. Greeting me often, asking to be petted, begging for my food, etc. Youtube: One Piece:
This is my wallpaper for October. It's Gilbert or Gil, who's sometimes referred to as Raven (because of his 'chain'), from Pandora Hearts. This seemed Halloween-like. Pandora Hearts as a series fits well with the holiday. It's loosely based on Alice and Wonderland, complex, some horror, and very dark. The anime didn't really do it justice. I might switch it to something else halfway through the month. The month-long holidays for October are: National Apple Month, National Caramel Month, National Pasta Month, National Pretzel Month, Bat Appreciation Month, LGBTQ+ History Month, German-American Heritage Month, National Cookbook Month, Spinach Lovers Month. Some are for important causes, some are to make you appreciate things you may take for granted, and some are just for fun. Rosh Hashanah was Sunday night until Tuesday night. It was our New Year (lit. translated to Head [of] the Year), and the first month is Tishri. For RH, we eat honey and sweet things for a sweet year. We eat round challah (an egg bread), which has many meanings. One of them that I like is that it represents the life cycle. Time isn't truly linear in Judaism. Instead, it goes in cycles. We're just starting another one. There are also things like Tu B'Shevat which is the New Year for the Trees. There are technically 4 'New Years', but RH is the main one. I 'attended' the 1st night and 1st morning/afternoon services online. Central Synagogue in NYC live-streamed it all, like their Shabbat ones. It's also the start of the High Holy Days or Days of Awe. That goes for 10 days, and ends with Yom Kippur or Day of Atonement. During those 10 days, it's supposed to be a time of deep introspection, asking forgiveness, how we can better ourselves and the community, and more. The day after RH ends is a minor fast day called the Fast of Gedaliah. I've never observed it, and can't even if I wanted to. I did eat less than usual on Wednesday, though. Some people think it's a warm-up fast day for YK, but it's really remembering the assassination of Gedaliah, who was a governor of Judah. YK is considered to be the most important holiday on the Jewish calendar. It's considered the Shabbat of Shabats. (Shabbat being our day of rest.) We're supposed to fast from sunset to sunset. 25 hours. It doesn't just mean no food, but also no drinks, gum, etc. I can't fast because of my meds and colitis. They say if it'll harm your health, it'll be a sin if you do so anyways. I still feel guilty about it almost every year. Children are also exempt from fasting. The elements calendar features copper this time. There's a mini periodic table made out of pure copper, copper in bullion form, a weave chain made out of wired copper, and a brass, which is a copper alloy, ring. It's a very useful element. I looked at the test results that recently came back. The x-rays appeared normal. Even though my hands certainly don't seem normal. The lumps are soft tissue-based then, which is better than them being something like calcium deposits. My fingers look more twisted, but they said it looked fine in the x-ray...Pretty much everything but one test came back as normal or negative. The ANCA titer was a strong positive. They said the pattern may suggest 2 rare diseases, but other aspects might go along with IBD (Inflammatory Bowel Disease), and a couple of other autoimmune diseases. He did warn me that it might pick up on my colitis and be positive that way. The scleroderma blood test noted that getting a negative result doesn't necessarily rule it out. ~20% of patients with scleroderma have positive results for that one. That seems like a small amount. They suggested other tests to try. I'm thinking of asking about those in an email to my rheumatologist. I still haven't made a dermatology appointment, and they might order more tests. My rheum. told me depending on the results, my next office appointment with him would be in 6 months. If the scleroderma test had come back positive, he would have made a phone appointment. He also briefly mentioned lupus and how he didn't want to start treatment for that before they tested for other things. I don't think that's what it is, but at least he seems to be trying to help me. Hopefully, he'll agree to running those other tests. I've also been getting weird red fluid filled sacs in my mouth. They're not particularly painful, but annoying and a little off-putting. One of the most recent ones showed up right next to where the jaws hinge together in my right cheek. Really far back there. I thought it was a wad of food or something. That's kind of kept me from enjoying food, and deciding to eat less on Wednesday. Most of the time those sacs show up on my lip. The area inside that rubs against my teeth. They end up popping after a while (probably from the rubbing), letting out stuff, and leaving behind craters. I don't think the one near my jaws has popped yet. Although, it does taste weird sometimes. I apparently am going to be a social media and camera person for the local trans group. I'm going to create Instagram and twitter accounts for the group. They already have 2 facebook groups. 1 public page, and 1 secret group. Those are essentially covered. There are admins and mods there, and quite a few active people. We just don't have any other social media presence. Not everyone uses facebook. We can't even access the old website, for a variety of reasons. One of the facilitators is going to create a group email account, then I'll create the Instragram and twitter accounts with that. Nice I won't have to use my personal email. I'll also ask members of the secret group on fb, once I've created those other accounts, if they have other social media suggestions. I think these are the main 3 that are the most popular, but I'd still want input. I'll create an image for Instagram to share every time we have a meeting coming up, and maybe one for when the facilitators won't be available (that's rare). With twitter, I could just type that out. I'll create images for events and other announcements, too. I can take pics of the group at special events, like Pride or ones that we create, and post them to those accounts. Of course, I'll ask people before I take the pics if they're cool with being in them. That's important. We could have a record of what the group has participated in this way. I'm thinking of also posting things that are trans related, possibly memes and articles, there as well. That way those accounts can still seem active. We only have 2 or 3 meetings a month. It might be nice to see things in between. I love taking pics, and since I'll be taking them, I might not be in a lot of them. I'm happy with that. Oh and I'll mention if people want the location, they'll have to pm those accounts. It's a safety issue if the exact address is listed publicly. We might need to change to a different room anyways, since a class was meeting Wednesday night in our room at that time. We thought it was cleared up already, but they might need to be 'reminded' every quarter. It's at a college currently. Finished watching Kimetsu no Yaiba. The animation was amazing! Apparently, the next story arc will be a movie. They ended it with them making it on a train for their next mission. Only Zenitsu knew what a train was. It takes place during the Taisho period (1912-1926). Tanjirou grew up in the mountains and Inosuke is used to living in the forests. So, of course they aren't going to know much about it. Inosuke thought it was some sort of demon and tried to attack it as soon as he saw it. It's interesting that they sneak in some of the modernization and cultural shifts that were going on at the time. Hopefully, there will be another actual season after that. There were a lot of twists and turns. Finished watching the last season of Fairy Tail. It was ok. Somehow the last season didn't seem as great as the previous ones. Fairy Tail's manga started in 2006 and ended in 2017. The anime started in 2009. It's had a lot of breaks between seasons. A lot of people thought the last battle ended too soon and too easily. However, Natsu had the power of all the dragon slayers against that final villain. That was a huge power-up. Some made fun of it because the magic coming off of him at that point was rainbow colored. Saying it was too 'gay' or something. I don't mind the idea of LGBTQ+ community defeating the most powerful villain...I'm surprised they didn't say it looked more like a Power Rangers thing. People also didn't like the idea of friendship giving them boosts. Like friendship is magic. As corny as it sounds, I like that, though. I felt that they considered the guild members as family, not just friends. In fact, the series mentioned that numerous times. That's a stronger type of bond to me. Many fans were pissed off that Natsu and Lucy didn't kiss at the end. I have a feeling Natsu might be aro ace. Lucy obviously isn't. She expected him to kiss her at the end, too. Instead he said that they'll be best friends forever. That was pretty awesome in my view. Many stories that have a boy and girl as protagonists make them end up as a romantic couple. This was a good break from that. They seemed to hint at another season at the end. Even though this was supposed to be it. I don't think I'll watch it if there is. Finished watching Darr Sabko Lagta Hai or Everybody Feels Fear on Netflix. I liked it overall. Some of it was overacted, corny, and low-budget. Some of the stories were based on Hindu mythology, and others on Indian culture in general. That was really interesting. The 'scariness' was more psychological. Each episode ended with an uneasiness and hints the story never actually ended. I thought that was a smart way of doing it. The last story was the goriest and most brutal. I didn't like that one as much as the others. Started watching the 2nd season of Radiant and Ascendance of a Bookworm. I still find it interesting that Radiant is an adaptation of a French manga. There are hints of French culture, history, and humor in it. Ascendance of a Bookworm is another isekai (different world) anime. This genre seems to just be getting more popular every season. It's about a librarian who absolutely loves books. She died one day, but as she was about to she begged that in her next life she'd be able to read all the books she wanted to. Reminds me of that Twilight Zone episode where a man who loves books ends up in a post-apocalyptic world with just books around him, however his glasses break. So, he can't read any of them. She woke up to find that she was reincarnated as a frail little girl. In their world, there are no book stores. Only the very rich can afford books. Each copy is made by hand. Very similar to what it was like before the printing press in our world. Most people in theirs are illiterate. The only thing they can read are numbers for things like prices. She did find one book, but the shopkeeper wouldn't let her touch it. It was too valuable and her reaction was too suspicious. She's decided to write and make her own books instead. Haven't gotten to it, but apparently she has some sort of magical powers in that world. I tried another isekai yesterday, but couldn't stand more than 5 minutes of it. Started watching The Truth Seekers on Netflix. It's a Singaporean detective drama, mainly in Mandarin (there's a little English and Japanese). It's aka Cold Case Investigators. Bai Qingxiong, a veteran cop, creates a detective agency that specializes in solving cold cases. He was tired of not bringing closure to the families of the victims in such cases. At the moment, they meet at a Japanese restaurant that his wife owns. Looking at the opening, it seems like they might get an actual place for it eventually. Each case might affect them personally. In this first one, one of the detectives, Huang Yuyang, was in a relationship with the main suspect briefly. That main suspect was actually the one that hired them to solve the case. I guessed right on who the real killer was. Yay! It looks like the main suspect from that case (he wasn't the killer) will join them. A couple of the actors look familiar. I haven't watched too many Singaporean dramas, but I looked up one of the actors and he was in Against the Tide. It'd make sense that I'd remember him since he played a main character. Youtube: One Piece:
This is my wallpaper for September. It's Tanjirou from Demon Slayer: Kimetsu no Yaiba (Demon-Slaying Blade). I've been really amazed by this anime. Wasn't expecting much. The animation has been top-notch (just looking at the water scenes, it looks so real, which is difficult to pull off), music is haunting at times, the characters are well developed, epic fight scenes, and the plot is interesting. I wasn't expecting much because it's essentially a zombie anime. There's so much more to it, though. It takes place in the Taisho period, which is 1912-1926. So, more 'modern' than some of the other anime I've watched that are historically based. I like the idea that Tanjirou only joined the Demon Slayers to cure his sister, Nezuko, of being a demon. The demons in the story more closely resemble zombies in that they eat people and were once human themselves. They still have a sense of self, intelligence, and magical abilities. Scarier this way. Nezuko seems to be one of the first demons that hasn't eaten a single human. Instead, she gathers energy by sleeping. She was kind of tricked into thinking all humans are family and to protect them at all costs. She's incredibly strong, even for a demon. She's also cute. Tanjirou is kindhearted and a huge empath. He feels for most of the demons he defeats. The month-long holidays for September are: National Biscuit Month, National Breakfast Month, National Honey Month, National Potato Month, National Rice Month, National Cheese Month, National Piano Month, Pain Awareness Month. Some are for important causes, some are to make you appreciate things you may take for granted, and some are just for fun. Quite a lot this month. The month of Elul ends with Rosh Hashanah or our New Year. It's also the start of the High Holy Days, which ends with Yom Kippur or the Day of Atonement. The HHDs last for 10 days. RH and YK are the most important holidays on the Jewish calendar. Many people 'prepare' the month before. One of the customs I follow (as did my mom) is blowing the shofar (ram's horn) every morning throughout most of the month. We refrain from it on Shabbos (which is every Friday night until Saturday night). I sometimes forget to do it until a few days into the month, like this year. Hopefully, I'll remember tomorrow and the rest of the month...It can be fun. It's supposed to wake us up spiritually. The elements calendar features arsenic this time. The main pic's of pure arsenic metal granules. The one next to it is of a type of arsenic treated wood. Another pic's of an old tin of arsenic. The last pic's of Paris Green, which is useful in pigments and rat poison. Scary one for this month. Recently 2 groups on fb shared the same post. One in an ace group, and the other in a non-binary one. It was an 'adding' game where you state your age and post a selfie, then friend whoever interacts with it. I almost didn't respond to either posts, thinking it was just a popularity contest. However, it was a good way to let others know it was ok to friend them. Some people might not want to for many reasons. Also, a great way to connect with other LGBTQ+ people on there. So, I did eventually post in both of them. I gained 25 friends through that over the weekend. I think that's the most I've had in such a short time. Also, overall, I'm up to the most friends I've had on my list at once there. They all seem like cool and interesting people. We did our big monthly grocery shopping yesterday. We normally go to Costco, but it was closed for Labor Day. So, we went to Trader Joe's. I think I only found one thing there: olive hummus. Haven't had hummus in a very long time. I like making hummus and cheese sandwiches. They're refreshing, tasty, and full of protein. The olive one is one of the best. They also had chocolate hummus. That sounds nasty. I did read an article about it, and the author was surprised by how great it was. I don't know... We also went to a local bakery. I love their Norwegian brown bread, and I usually get it sliced. Turns out that the ones that were available were frozen. They can't cut it until it thaws enough. Last time that happened it took like 3 hours. I didn't want to go through that again. On the other hand, it is getting harder to cut things, so it makes it even more difficult than before for me. I also got a maple doughboy. It's one of the things they're known for. It's huge! It's like a gingerbread man, only in donut form. This one had maple frosting. The other version is glazed. There's a smoked goods shop right next to it. They have smoked salmon, smoked nuts, smoked cheeses, jams, spices, and other snack-like things. I got smoked cheddar (one of my faves) and blueberry jam. I don't think I had their blueberry jam before. Too many seeds can be a trigger for my gut. So, I thought a jam with either very few/none or really small seeds would be best. I still like to have it. I think the blueberry one follows that. Went to World Market after that. Found quite a lot of things this time. Got my fave pickled red cabbage and apple salad, an artichoke pasta sauce, dill pickle mustard, pumpkin spice pancake mix (I still have a little of their banana and caramel pancake mix, and it's easy and delicious), pumpkin spice yogurt pretzels, and a few other things. Went to a local market for dinner yesterday. I just grabbed what I could eat at the salad bar. I'm trying to be better about avoiding trigger foods, and eating more protein. I need more protein than most healthy people, since I tend to have issues with absorbing it. It's hard for me to even get over half of what's considered the normal range for healthy people. Since I have to stay away from most raw vegetables, I steered clear of most of the greens like lettuce and spinach. Making it not really look like a 'healthy' salad. Shredded carrots seem to be ok, as well as a few cherry tomatoes. They had turkey, hard-boiled eggs, olives, and various other types of salads like potato salad and orzo salad. Didn't turn out as much as I expected, but it was ok. At Safeway, I found another mug cake mix thing. This time it's a chocolate chip cookie with chocolate frosting from the same company that did the cinnamon roll one. Should be interesting. Since it's so many calories and sugar, I'm saving it for my treat days. They also had a 12-pack of their rainbow chip (like M&Ms) cookies that were cheap. I got the small packs of 2 in the past. They're really good. It will last me a while. I pretty much have my desserts set for the next couple of weeks at least. Yay! Went out to Costco today. Realized later that we got a lot of protein-packed things. I'm going to try 2 more different types of jerky. One's teriyaki beef and the other is beef steak. They actually have decent amounts to a bag there. I decided a couple of days ago to count the lumps I have at the moment. I've thought for a while that it was just around 5 of them and no big deal, but never counted them until then. There are over 30 of them! Most are in my hands. There's one big one in my neck, another in between my right eye and nose, another on a toe, and another in the crook of my left elbow. Some are soft, but a lot of them are hardening. Some seem to be growing so much they might burst through the surface. The hard ones in my hands feel weird when I grip things. Whatever I'm holding feels bumpy or uneven, even if it's smooth and straight. Some of the bumps are getting so big, I can see them just from looking at the sides of my fingers. I wonder if they're calcium deposits? I hope not. At least most of the time they're not painful. I see my primary in the middle of this month. Maybe she'll order imaging on at least my hands. I'll see my rheumatologist at the end of that week. He'll probably be able to help a lot more. Both arms are still hurting a lot. I tried Tylenol PM last night, because the pain was also keeping me from sleeping, and I felt I needed to try something for it. The problem is so many sleep aids can mess with my mental health stuff, and so many can affect my colitis, possibly setting off a flare. That eliminates many right there. The only painkiller my primary will let me have is Tylenol, and I've been told by GIs that NSAIDs can cause flares or make it worse. I looked it up online, and Tylenol PM seems to be the safest for people with IBD in general. It basically has Benadryl and extra strength Tylenol. Benadryl's usually safe for the mental health part, too. I think I got a little more sleep. It was mostly calming. So, even when I was awake in bed, I was more relaxed. That's nicer than without. I guess I'll see how it goes after a few nights. I pinned a sausage and hash browns slow-cooker recipe a while back on Pinterest onto one of my boards. I think I mentioned it on here after I made it. I was the first to share a pic of it. I did not create the pin. However, a ton of people have been repinning it from me. Around 200! It's like every hour or so I get a notification on it. Kind of annoying. I've never had that happen before. Sure, a handful of people repin my pins normally, but this is very different. It doesn't even look that great. It tasted amazing, though! Despite not going back to my Dutch this weekend (including Monday) on Duolingo, I was promoted to the Sapphire League today. That shocked me. How could I still be in the top 10 by the end of that week? I finished the Kitchen unit, and am close to finishing the Materials one. Managed to draw a rough outline of Junko's legs. Took a little while to figure how I wanted to position them. Edited more of Alliance. I'm into chapter 4 now. Went through 6 pages of the ebook, and 8 pages of the print. That's more than I was doing each day last week. Maybe I'll get to a lot more this time. It's flowing a lot better now.
