Wednesday, April 26, 2017

National Pretzel Day!

I love pretzels! Especially the soft kind. I used to get pretzel rolls for sandwiches, but got kind of tired of them after a while. It's good to have occasionally. I also like honey mustard and onion nibblers, but can't seem to find them locally anymore. They're little hard pretzels shaped like pillows. They do carry the 'pieces' version of them still. They're like broken bits of the same thing. I like when they're whole. It's harder to portion them out if they're broken. They also have a ranch version, but it's not nearly as good. The plain is just meh. 

This morning, I finally called the Digestive Health Specialists. I was going to reschedule the appointment that was for Monday. It was to see the gastroenterologist that did my colonoscopy. They said when I had made that appointment, I needed to have a follow-up for it. I was going to bring up a bunch of things and talk about my meds. I just stopped taking azathioprine on Monday, after all. So, I'm without a 'safety net'. While I'm in 'clinical' remission, I still have to have something to keep it in check. They say people can flare again at any time, too. I was having weird side effects, and wasn't metabolizing it. 

Anyways, they said he likes morning appointments, and he doesn't have a slot for the afternoon until August. That's too long of a wait. So, they suggested that specialist that I can't stand anymore. They said these are the only 2 who 'specialize' in IBD at their Tacoma location. They said they can ask if one of the nurses that doesn't specialize in it can take me. That one has a lot of slots open for late afternoons. The problem is they have to do some going back and forth before they can schedule an appointment for me this way. They suggested other locations. Finally, I decided I'd make a phone appointment with my primary. I'll see what she has to say about it. I can bring up the other locations. A couple of them actually sounded closer to where I'm coming from. I'm unsure about what to do at the moment with this. I know when I saw my primary recently, she said she'd prefer that I stay in-network and go to their clinic in Seattle. This feels kind of messy...Why did I have to get something like this, when there aren't that many 'specialists' or gastroenterologists near me?

Lately, I've been seeing more things that misrepresent aro aces. It's starting to piss me off a bit. One of the recent comics I saw, that was shared by AVEN's fb page (I of the big pages I follow), was really horrendous. It put romantic aces in a very positive light. I'm cool with that. That's the way it should be for everyone. However, they made the aro ace character a joke. First saying: "Let's not forget aro aces!" Then, off to the side, saying they're "forever alone, and proud". No, that's not what it means! Why do we have to be joked about? All aromantic means is not experiencing romantic attraction to anyone. That's it. It does not mean we want to be 'forever alone'. That phrase is also condescending and makes people look pathetic. Some aro aces do want to be alone their entire life, and that's perfectly fine. But, this also insults them. There was an outcry from a lot of aro aces on this. Many of the romantic aces shot back by saying things like: "I don't know what's the big deal. It's just supposed to be a short and sweet comic." "It doesn't have to be perfect." "It's ok to use stereotypes to get the point across." "They said everyone is different at the end." "It's a good way to introduce new people to it." No! I have ideas where it could have been much shorter and in broader terms. It's not cool to show that to someone that has just started learning about it. They'll get the wrong impression. If the comic misrepresented romantic aces, they would have issues with it, too. And, the 'everyone is different' thing seemed to be saying that about romantic aces. 

I'm amazed that it came from AVEN. I think a lot of aro aces have issues with them, though. I've seen some pretty nasty threads towards aro aces in the past on there. They aren't that often, at least that I've seen. One of the worst was someone saying they couldn't believe that aro aces don't understand love. Saying things like we must have something wrong with us, and we just need to be more open. So much wrong with this! People seem to forget that there are so many different types of love out there. Like, familial love (family in general), parental love, sibling love, neighborly love, platonic love, sexual (for those who are aro and sexual) love, love for one's country, pet love, love of cultures, love of food, etc. I think it's also normal to ask someone about a type of attraction they don't experience. In fact, that brings about some understanding for everyone. When I brought this up, I got a lot of likes, and the op said I opened her eyes. Aro aces shouldn't have to educate everyone about it themselves, though. We're apparently 15-20% of the population of aces on there. A minority within a minority. They shouldn't be saying such negative things about us, still. 

Another one I saw in one of the closed ace fb groups. Someone had posted a chart they found and were confused by it. They recently realized they were ace. It was titled, The Four Primary Attractions. First of all, most people bring up 5. They had sexual, romantic, sensual, and aesthetic on one side. Totally leaving out platonic. I would say, platonic is actually the 3rd major one. Sensual and aesthetic are not touched on that often. At least, not to the degree of sexual, romantic, and platonic. Also, many aro aces go by their platonic attraction, so it kind of erases that. Then, they had asexual, aromantic, and average going across the top. There are huge issues with using 'average'. Better than 'normal', but still...They had x's for what we don't experience, and check marks for what we might. In the romantic part they used having a relationship as part of the example. The aro column had an x with that. It didn't even say something like desire a [romantic] relationship. Somehow we're incapable of having any sort of relationship...I've been in a romantic relationship before, so that's wrong. Also, they must not have known about things like qpr's. It's a relationship based on emotional/platonic love. I would love to be in one. For qpr's, aro aces go by their platonic attraction. This isn't 'just' friends, it's desiring a really close best friend. Mine's pan this way, but others could be things like bi, hetero, homo, etc. this way. Pan, meaning gender doesn't matter, I can be attracted to anyone this way. Some people are actually aplatonic. I can't imagine that for myself, but I'll definitely respect them. About 3 of the aro aces, including me, in the group spoke up about it. I'm going to try and speak up about stuff like this every time I come across it. Might be tiring, but how else are people going to learn?
I also read somewhere that in Bill Nye's new show on Netflix, Bill Nye Saves the World, there's an episode titled The Sexual Spectrum. So, I decided to check it out last night. I remember watching Bill Nye the Science Guy in junior high. Actually, it was apart of one of my science classes. He's always had a comedic side and tries to make things seem interesting to people. His new show seems to be mainly about debunking things. This episode was really about sex (chromosomes), attraction, gender, and gender expression. I'm surprised that he covered these. I think it would have been better titled The Sexual and Gender Spectrum. Just using 'sexual' gives people the wrong idea. Although, he seemed to use it that way to grab people's attention. I thought it was pretty well done, except for the song at the end. That was a bit much. Funny, but a little too sexual for me. It was very simplified, but I think it's hard to talk about such huge topics in only about 20 minutes. Also, he did say that people are a lot more complex with these aspects. Felt like it was a good starter to look into these things. A jumping off point, and people can look stuff up later. He did mention asexuality and other sexualities that aren't talked about often. Didn't explain them, though. They only covered sexual attraction for the attraction part, which is understandable if they don't have much time. They had a segment on how Kpop is changing views on gender expression. That was interesting. In a way, some subgenres of Jpop have changed those views, too. It doesn't seem to have had the same impact as Kpop, though. I liked his final thoughts at the end. It made the spectrum sound even more beautiful and cool. The panel he had was interesting. One of them was a cultural anthropologist. I wanted to eventually focus on cultural, when I was majoring in anthropology. So, this was cool to see. I don't think I've seen many things in the media that put LGBTQ+ people in such a positive light.

Started brainstorming my memoir yesterday. I'm still unsure if it'll be an autobiography or a memoir. I know memoirs are about the person's experiences and memories. Autobiographies sound a bit colder and more precise. I don't know, there seems to be a very fine line. I decided that I'll officially decide on which it is after I've written it. Just make it my own, and see later. I came up with a lot of topics. Thinking of using those as chapter titles. There are many layers to most of those topics I could write about. It's an interesting way of thinking about what I've gone through. I'm hoping to do a little of Alliance one day, and a little of the memoir the next. Keep that going for a while.

Finished watching Hotel Bon Sejour on Netflix. It's a Belgian, Flemish-language, supernatural detective show. It was really good and full of surprises. Apparently, they're going to make new seasons focusing on a different murder each time. The person who was killed sticks around until their murder is solved. With this one, only people that saw her on the night she died could see her. It might be that way for the others, too. She tried desperately to find who killed her herself. She was able to leave clues for the ones that could see her. That town was messed up, too. 

Finished watching the anime Saiki Kusuo no Psi Nan or Saiki Kusuo's Disastrous Life. It was really good. I liked it pretty much since the first episode. The only problem is they spoke super fast. I found it interesting that Kusuo seemed so aro. Not sure if he's ace. Although, he didn't seem interested in sex, either. He would say that romance was such an alien concept to him. He just didn't understand it, but tried to help his friends if things got weird in their romantic relationships. He really cared about everyone, but kept telling himself that he wanted to be left alone. His friends had a birthday party for him during the last episode. Only, they misheard. It was really his dad's birthday, so he made his father look like him and didn't want to go. After watching for a while, he realized he really should enjoy the party they planned for him. It was nice to see him warm up a bit more to them that way. He never actually spoke out loud. Just talked to people telepathically. However, I saw him ordering stuff over the phone before. How does that work? Is he so powerful, he can 'talk' telepathically over the phone? There's going to be a 2nd season, just no date for it yet. It's still nice to know there will be more at some point.

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