Tomorrow night's the start of Yom Kippur or the Day of Atonement. One of the holiest days of the year for us. Like usual, Shabbat starts that night, too. Yom Kippur is sometimes referred to as the Shabbat of Shabbats. So, it's even more so this way? I'll attend Central Synagogue's online services again for it. Most people are told to fast during the holiday. Can't have food, water, gum, etc. The ones who are exempt from that are little kids, people who are pregnant, the elderly, and those with health conditions. If these people do fast, it's as though they sinned. Just like it would be for someone who eats when they aren't exempt from it. I have to eat something with my meds, food helps regulate it as well, and it's not good to fast when you have colitis (unless a medical professional instructs you to). I still feel guilty that I have to eat during that day.
I'm up to 205 pages, altogether, with writing the sequel to Alliance and the memoir. (100 for the sequel, 105 for the memoir.) It's roughly twice that for paperback versions. Yay! That's good considering I started writing both in mid-May. I also didn't write for a few weeks, because it was so hot (not good to have my desktop computer on in the hottest room of the house) and I was sick. I wrote about half as many pages the first month, and for a while didn't write on Sundays. (The only day I don't write is on Saturdays, before it was both days.) It's the first time I'm writing two books at once, and I'm progressing much faster than I did for the other two books. (Alliance took the longest...) I wonder how much longer it'll take me to finish both? Not sure if one will be longer than the other. There's also the editing and reformatting...Still, it's exciting. It's a milestone for me.
I like how both books are turning out so far. The sequel has been unpredictable, but still follows the plot well. A little too well at times...Things that seemed unrelated are coming together. Makes it more fun and interesting. I'm remembering more parts of my life than I thought with the memoir. The topics for chapters have worked well for it. I'm in the midst of writing the physical health chapter. It's already longer than I thought it would be.
The non-binary facebook group I'm apart of has been interesting. I might look for a more active one in future, though. Most of the posts have also been intros and selfies. Not really much to them. One topic that came up was being non-binary and sexual/romantic attractions. If you had sexual/romantic attraction, what word would you use to describe it if you're not binary? Like, could someone be gay or straight if they weren't binary? This can be slightly controversial. Some people said they go by the 'genitals' that might interest them sexually. If they're afab (assigned female at birth) and are attracted to women, they'd call themselves lesbian. Similar with amab (assigned male at birth), and attracted to men feeling they're gay this way. Or, with afabs attracted to men, being straight. (And, vice a versa.) This can be a bit problematic on many fronts. Would trans men or women be included in this even if they might not have the 'matching' genitals? Why reduce it down to genitals? It seems so cold. Also, the non-binary person themselves is not a man or woman...Many non-binary people take issue with this. Many use the labels androsexual (or androromantic), gynesexual (or gyneromantic), and skoliosexual (or skolioromantic). That's sexually/romantically attracted to men, sexually/romantically attracted women, and sexually/romantically attracted to non-binary people. It seems better to me. Skoliosexual can be a bit controversial outside of the community. Since it's hard to tell until they tell you, and non-binary people might congregate together more...It still sounds complicated. I'm glad I'm aro ace. I don't have to deal with that. Also, with the strongest attraction I do feel, platonic (it's different than being 'just' friends...), I'm pan. I'm attracted to people this way regardless of gender. It's good to know for qpr's or queer (or quasi-) platonic relationships, which I would love to be in. So, even with this attraction I don't need to think of the right label. It's already applicable to me. I'm attracted to men aesthetically, though. This way, I guess, it'd be andro-. Hardly use that sort of attraction, though. It's not as important to me.
Another topic that came up recently was in a comment to a post. They told the person they aren't trans. They're non-binary. They went into this weird thing about how we don't have gender dysphoria, and don't need surgeries. Apparently, there isn't 'treatment' for us, too. There was so much wrong with their comment and many people jumped in to correct them, including me. We are under the trans umbrella. Trans just means you identify as a gender that's different than the one you were assigned at birth. That boils down to anyone who isn't cis. Sure, some non-binary people might feel uncomfortable with being under the trans umbrella, and not identify with that community. That's completely up to them, but they don't speak for the community.
I'm afab (it feels like it should be 'was', but I've only heard it as 'am'), and agender. I'm not a woman (and never was, although sex is different), therefore by definition I'm trans. It took me a little while to realize this, though. For a while I thought trans people were binary. They had to be transitioning in some way, too. This was wrong. I remember reading that the person who came up with the trans flag, made a point in saying the white stripe represented non-binary identities. This made me feel a bit better about it. I just mostly see binary trans people at trans meetings and events, so it's easy to feel like you don't belong this way.
Many non-binary people experience gender dysphoria, and some binary trans people don't. I mentioned recently on here about how I feel about my breasts. I think I'm dysphoric about them. They don't feel right, and weird me out sometimes. I don't feel it as bad as some people I've read about, but I think it's there. Some people who are afab and agender, want mastectomies. Some I've read want their...downstairs...to be smoothed out surgically, too. (Don't know what that's called.) That seems unique to agender people. Maybe some androgynous people do as well? There are specific ways that non-binary people can transition. I'm just starting to learn about it. It's fascinating, even if I don't go that route.
By the way, I noticed that comment was eventually deleted, and the person might have been banned. They're very strict about the rules. They don't even allow allies. Especially, not cis people. They have a separate group that allows allies. Both binary trans people and cis people. There was a cis person that made it into the group that's an exclusive space for us, and she complained about people negatively posting about cis people. The thing is many people have been semi positive about cis people. There are some that, understandably, vent at length about cis people. They need this sort of outlet, and to talk to people that understand. So, she immediately was attacked by lots of people. A few mods stepped in, suggesting the other group. She proclaimed that she'll quit the group since we hate our allies so much. It was strange. If you're an ally, you have to realize people are angry about how they're treated. They don't hate you specifically. They hate the system, the world is set up for binary people, and it seems most cis people are against or at least think they can debate our very existence. They understand binary trans people more than non-binary ones. So, you can see how this can affect the community. Even some binary trans people try to invalidate our existence, yet they're just a very small vocal minority.
Rosie recently went to the vet's for a check-up. She hadn't had one for 5 years. Basically since Mom passed away. She's the worst of all the cats we've had about getting into the carrier. (We thought Drifter was bad enough about it.) Dad managed to get her in after a major struggle. She threw up a little, pooped, and peed in the process. She was that scared. It was painful to watch. We think she may have been abused by her previous owners by making her stay in a carrier for far too long. She may have had to use it as a bathroom sometimes. Which might be why she claws at things after using the litter box. She may have tried to get out of a carrier once she did her business in it. That makes me feel worse somehow...
Anyways, she's a little overweight, just like Tasha. So, the plan is for both of them to have weight loss cat food soon. Her teeth were unusually healthy for her age. She's about 9 or 10. We got her around my birthday in 2011. She's updated on her shots now. They clipped her nails, too. She felt better afterwards, and has become even more loving towards me which is kind of creepy in a way. Mostly nice, though.
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