Mood:
Yay, for music!
This was on Saturday. We should celebrate listening and/or making music every day, though. But, some people might need a reminder every so often. The organization that started it, says it's a day to encourage people from around the world to make some sort of music. If they can't, at the very least listen to something that's inspiring or that really resonates with them. Kind of a cool idea.
The weather was crazy on Saturday. It was very rainy and windy. In fact, it apparently had gotten so bad that downtown (along the waterfront) was flooded. The videos I've seen of it are amazing to watch. (One person calls it a 'hurricane' in their vid.) It's like a river opened up over the main road.
The lights flickered occasionally during the day here, but there wasn't any real flooding around us, and the power didn't go out. Just looked really messy outside. Sunday was a bit chilly, but sunny at times. Quite different than the day before.
I still feel like I'm slowly coming out of my cold or whatever it was.
I'm a lot better than I was, though. Hoping to start up my sit-ups again on a regular basis. I did them last night and this morning. So, it's a start. Doing 10 sit-ups 2 times a day this week. Somewhere simple to start with. It'd be great if I can get back to my 2-mile walks again, too.
Something has been weighing heavily on my mind since Wednesday.
(Although, I feel a lot better today about it.) I was told that I'm off of my health insurance, after I tried to order more of the azathioprine. Funny thing is, I ordered another med on the 2nd, and didn't have any problems with it. In fact, it was cheaper than usual. Which had me really puzzled.
Dad had switched jobs to a local school district recently (she works at the high school that's about a 5 minute walk from home now), and I think the insurance changes over in October. (I'm a dependent on it.) It's supposed to be the same sort of plan, because it's the one offered to all 'educators' in the state. (I think.)
Anyways, I decided to put the azathioprine on hold for a few days to see if it was a glitch. It was still the same yesterday. I had to order it, considering I'll run out on the 19th. They still haven't updated the dosage, so I get 20 days of it instead of 30.
They told me I should tell my doctor about it when I got my meds right away, so it's changed for next time. Thank goodness it didn't cost as much as the med I got on the 2nd, if I wasn't covered. Normally, for that one while I'm covered, it's $6. When I ordered it on the 2nd, it was $3. If I wasn't covered, it would have been about $140. Crazy!
That's a huge difference.
I read that there might be a waiting period between the switch to the 'new plan'. Some say it might be until the 15th. I'm a little angry about it (ok, maybe more than just a little angry...
), but I'd be so relieved if it did kick in then. Some say it might be as long as 90 days. I can't wait that long...Found out last night that Dad's off of it now for the time being, as well. (She really needs it, too.) So, it kind of feels like I'm falling without a safety net at the moment.
Luckily, I'm pretty stable right now with my IBD. Although, this has caused a bit of stress on it. I was supposed to get a blood draw at the beginning of this month, but knowing that I'm not covered yet, I'm putting it off. It's free while I'm covered, but without it, it can be pretty expensive to have lab work done. They show how much the insurance pays for that and other things on a chart online so you can see how much things would cost. It's interesting to look at if you're covered. If not, it can be scary.
If I do get back on the plan on the 15th, I'll get the blood draw done as soon as I can after that. I'm going to email my gastro about some of this stuff soon.
It feels scary also because I still feel new to IBD stuff. I feel I still don't know much about it, even though I'm learning a lot. I read a lot of it also has to do with how each individual's body reacts to it. It's different for everyone. That's also another scary part, since I was very recently diagnosed. Not enough time to really know what it's doing, or what the meds are doing to me. So not being covered feels like throwing me to the wolves this way.
Since I started azathioprine (especially with the most recent dose), I've noticed that my nails have thinned, become soft, and are somewhat rubbery. It's a weird feeling. I noticed it a bit before I upped the dose when I took off a Jamberry nail thing. (They're kind of like really strong stickers or decals for your nails. They have some interesting styles.) It left marks, and part of the inner nail area flaked off. I did it exactly as they told me to. Now my nails easily bend, get little nicks in them, have weird ripples/indents, and can be hard to clip. The hard to clip part is mainly because of that rubbery thing. (I only used the Jamberry samples on my index fingers, so it definitely didn't cause this. So, I'm not downing them.) It's kind of sad.
I'm staying far away from Jamberry now. I only tried it once, but it doesn't sound smart for me right now. I'm even a bit weary of nail polish, but think it might be better for me.
I might also be losing muscle mass or 'wasting' slowly. Wasting's such a weird term for it, but that's what people call it. I normally am extremely muscular in my legs. I know, because not only did I do marching band from the beginning of junior high until a few years into college; I took 2 weight training classes. One in high school, and the other in college. Weight training's also a gauge since I could see how much weight certain muscles could stand in my body. I remember the first time I was on the 'sled' in the high school class, I started with the wrong amount of weight. 200 pounds.
It's a machine where you lie back and push up a platform that holds weights with your legs. Normally, people start with maybe 20 pounds at most. The 200 pounds felt like nothing, which impressed the teacher. I was allowed to slowly continue adding weights to it as long as I had a spotter. (He lectured me first about safety with the weights.
) I think I made it close to 400 without much of a problem. I beat a football player who challenged me on it.
Interestingly, I think there were only one or two other girls in that class. It was similar in college. That shows you how strong my legs can naturally be. I also had to walk uphill to a lot of my classes in college, getting my 'cougar' calves. (The cougar is their mascot.) I also had to walk to school and back in junior high and high school. Sometimes I had to walk to and from several times, because of band stuff or clubs. Anyways, I'm noticing that those muscles seem to be shrinking. I'm getting bonier in those areas. I don't want to lose them. I'm losing fat in those areas too, but I feel the muscles themselves are going as well. I don't feel as strong there. My upper arms feel weaker, too. It's a weird feeling.
I'm getting close to finishing Rurouni Kenshin. I don't really want it to end. The art just kept getting better and better. Seems pretty high quality for the time, too. The current arc is a bit weird. It's on feng shui, and how people are exploiting others through it. I wonder how the series will end? There are still movies, OVAs (Original Video Animation- usually either like a special or an original story based on the series. They can be a few episodes long), and 3 live-action movies. The live-action ones are rather new, and would also be very interesting. There are parts of the show that seem kind of 'magical', but are usually explained in a real life sort of way. So, I totally think it can be pulled off in live-action. I think I've watched one of the OVAs a long time ago. It was before I watched an episode of the actual series. I think it was called Rurouni Kenshin: Trust and Betrayal, and it was a lot more tragic and sad. I might watch it again, along with the other stuff I haven't seen, after I'm through with the series. I think I'll go in chronological order. The first thing is a movie from 1997.
The finale of Kekkai Sensen or Bloodline Battlefront was finally put out last week.
They postponed it for close to 3 months. It was roughly twice as long as a normal episode. I really love this series, so it was nice that they made it longer. I don't like that they made the fans wait for so long.
I get maybe having a couple weeks for a break, but 3 months? I read that one of the issues was that there were scheduling problems. Many people had complained in the comments section even after the finale that things seemed too random, it was too fast, and they didn't know what was happening. It sure didn't seem random to me, and even though it was pretty complex and quick, I understood most of it.
But, I like those ones that make you think. They still didn't answer a lot of things, but I think part of what made it good was the many little mysteries scattered throughout. (Of course, the humor was a huge plus.) It had a very bittersweet ending. Ghost or White disappeared. (She called herself Ghost at first to Leo.) I think she passed away, but gave Black (her brother) the power of the barrier. I think they got rid of the 'King of Despair', who was like the king of the vampires that hid in Black. He would take him over repeatedly, and had the opposite personality. (His eyes would go from blue to red, and he styled his hair differently.) I say he might have disappeared, because at the very end we heard the tune that the 'King' is always whistling coming from someone else. We don't see their face, but their back. There were hints of a possible 2nd season. Libra welcomed someone new at the very end. Again, they didn't really show this person. Leo's sister was shown at the end reading his letters while in her wheelchair at a park. Someone is behind her. She opens her eyes, and it seems like something happened with hers as well. I was thinking halfway through the series that maybe she's blind, but her eyes looked 'special'. Not like Leo's, but like they didn't have pupils, grey, and almost like she had galaxies in them. I'm wondering if the person behind her really read the letters out loud to her while she held them...(All we hear is Leo's voice reading it out.) We don't really know. Someone said White wasn't in the manga. She's pretty central to this season of the anime, but maybe that means there's even more of a possibility for it coming back. There are plenty of 'bad' guys left, too. I'd love a 2nd season, but hopefully they'd plan it better if it happens.
I don't know if I mentioned it, but I started watching the 2nd season of Kuroko no Basket or Kuroko's Basketball. It seems even more interesting this season. I think there's one more season to the series so far. I'm thinking of watching the 2nd season of Haikyuu that's currently airing, soon. Another sports themed one. Haikyuu revolves around volleyball.
Started reading Hyde and Closer recently. It was recommended to be similar to Hitman Reborn. I can see a lot of similarities already. The 'teacher' and the other stuffed animals seem much cuter and deadlier, though. (Rather than the 'babies' do in Reborn. Seemed like they were just going for weird and slightly cute in that one.) I like that sort of thing. Shunpei Closer's grandfather, Alsyd Closer, would travel around the world and always came back to Japan to tell his grandson about his amazing adventures. Before leaving for Africa, he gave Shunpei a teddy bear named Hyde on his 7th birthday. 6 years later and Shunpei receives a dangerous package that had a stuffed monkey inside. The stuffed monkey came to life and started attacking him. Later Hyde comes to 'life' and eventually saves him. Shunpei apparently comes from a long line of legendary mages. He's the last descendant left, and all mages from around the world are after him. If they kill him, they can gain immeasurable power. Apparently, his grandpa gave him Hyde to protect him, and to teach him how to hone his magical powers. Powers Shunpei didn't know he had. Hyde likes to put candy cigars in his mouth, drinks honey like it's whiskey, and has his weapon called 'Texas Chainsaw' stuck up inside him. Shunpei has to unzip Hyde's zipper in the back in order for him to take it out. So far he doesn't seem to have any friends or people that join forces with him yet, like Hitman Reborn did. It'd be interesting if it progressed like that. I wouldn't mind if it was similar, but had its own unique qualities.
Magico has gotten more and more interesting. It's a pretty unique series so far. I'm at the final round of the husband and wife tournament Shion and Emma are in. If they win, they finish one of the rituals for Magico and they get a magical home as the prize for winning the tournament. It feels like they've befriended almost everyone in the tournament. Shion's brother showed up, and asked him to stand in for a ritual for him where he's not sure if he'll survive. Later, Shion refused and said he'll do anything to stay happily with Emma. He doesn't want it to end like that. His brother, Faust, seems really evil. After being turned down, he got really pissed and showed himself as a contestant in the tournament. He was apparently signed up for it under a different name the entire time. Now he's out for blood against Shion. Saying Shion is so selfish, and only thinks about himself. Sounds like he has it backwards...
He's pretty powerful, but never became one of the great sages like Shion. He's resentful towards him, and considers Shion a failure of a human being. He apparently has the power to use the dead to fight, can kill and bring back people alive instantly, can pop in and out of people's mouths, and has some sort of black fire. Interesting. After the tournament, Shion promised a couple, their kid, and their cat that they'd be able to be neighbors in his dragon, Sieg. His dragon is like his son. He found his egg buried somewhere, and took care of it. His home is inside the dragon. It looks like there's a whole village inside, though. But, he along with Emma, Luu, and their cat are the only ones that live there. Shion was really lonely with just his cat there for a while, and thought it'd be great to have neighbors someday. The family also couldn't go back to where they came from, so it would be perfect. Interesting to see how it unfolds. And, after this part of the greater Magico ritual, what's next?
Yesterday, I drew a skull with a candle coming out of it, that'll be used in the cover art for my nightmare anthology. I finished it remarkably quickly. At least, for me it was quick. Turned out much better than I expected, too.
Didn't have to edit much in Photoshop. I'll color it in Photoshop and on my drawing pad to see which is better. (Color the candle, and maybe darken parts of the skull.) I'll use the best one. Then, I have to decide on a background color, any effects I want, and the title stuff. It's progressing much faster than I expected. Getting kind of exciting.
After I finish the cover art, I might do one more read through, and then I'll submit it to Smashwords. Then, it's a waiting game. The first approval will put it in their normal catalog. Then, after the 2nd approval, it's put into their 'premium' catalog and distributed to various online retailers. I think it took about 2 weeks for my first novel to go through the whole process. I've decided to call it: Sweet Endless Terror: An Anthology of Nightmares.
Mood:
Simchat Torah lit. means 'Rejoicing in the Law'. Torah is commonly translated to mean 'law', but also means 'teaching'. Today celebrates the last parsha or weekly Torah portion of the year, and the first parsha of the year starting the 'cycle' again. That beginning parsha of the year is read this Saturday. Some spread the parsha out for the entire week, but the parsha is chanted out loud at the synagogue during services. And, most people study Torah on Shabbat. For Simchat Torah, we sing and dance around with the Torahs at the synagogue, eat candy, sometimes the adults drink schnapps, read parts of the end and beginning of the scroll, and most synagogues roll out one of them and the congregation holds onto it as it is completely unrolled so everyone can look at it. You have to be careful not to touch the areas with letters. Or, really anywhere but the edges. The oils from our fingers can damage it. The parchment part is made out of lambskin, and writing is handmade by a skilled scribe using ink. It's a special style of writing Hebrew, too. Also, they omit the vowels...It's pretty impressive to see it totally unrolled. It's easier to move it to the beginning this way too. Some places eventually have the congregation dance with the Torahs out in the streets just outside the synagogue. It can be a pretty fun holiday.
I haven't gone to a Simchat Torah thing for a few years, though. I'm still sick, and don't want to be around a lot of people while on a higher dose of the new med. So, it wouldn't be a good idea to go this year. Don't want to feel worse...Also, we have a mini family Torah scroll. Complete with a cardboard arc it sits in. Even has a little yod, which is a pointer shaped like a hand with the pointer finger extended. It's the only way to keep your place without physically touching the letters. I think it has a tiny chest plate or shield, too. (Also, has it's own cover.) Kind of cute. Since it's mini-sized, it can be a bit difficult to actually read. It'd be interesting to just go through, though. It's also National Noodle Day, Mad Hatter Day, and National German-American Day. I'm part German. So, yay!
Celebrating more of my people that way. Noodles are awesome! I could probably eat them all day. The Mad Hatter is one of my fave characters from Alice in Wonderland. I think I remember reading that it's a day where the 'normal' is crazy, and the crazy stuff is normal. Kind of an interesting way of looking at things.
This is my wallpaper for October. It's Xerxes Break from Pandora Hearts. Back when he had long hair, and seemed a bit crazier. I think he's one of the most complex characters of the series. There were moments where you didn't really know which side he was on. Break was one of the first ones to go into the Abyss, meet the 'Will of the Abyss', and come out alive. He changed history in order to save someone (by asking the Will to help him), only to find out it didn't work out in the end. He also offset everyone's 'destiny' by doing so. The Will took out his eye during his meeting with her, and she gave it to Cheshire. (Originally was Alice's cat. Yep, like Alice in Wonderland...It's a big theme throughout the series, although it certainly has it's own unique story line. Might even be more twisted than Alice in Wonderland.) He loves sweets (sometimes he just eats sugar cubes), and usually has a doll on his shoulder named Emily. The doll sometimes talks. He's a bit of a trickster, incredibly manipulative, was once a knight and is a very skilled swordsman (his cane can turn into a sword), doesn't physically age, and is probably the strongest in the Pandora Hearts organization. The Mad Hatter is his Chain. He's one of my favorite characters. Anyways, I thought this was perfect for a Halloween-like theme.
My Paris calendar features the Eiffel Tower. Particularly around autumn. Cultural exhibits, shows, and movies fill the event schedule around it at this time. The European Cultural Heritage Days are held there at the end of September. Nuit Blanche or White Night is an annual night arts festival during the first weekend of October.
My Jewish calendar's main pic features a Torah shield, anonymous maker, made out of silver, Germany; 1750-1800. Torah shields go over the covering for the scrolls. Usually, there are some beautiful designs. Some have removable plates that have holiday names written out in Hebrew. This one seems to be stuck on Shavuot. I would have thought they'd find one with Simchat Torah on it (if it had to have the removable plates), to go with the theme, since the holiday is during this month. But, that's ok, it's Torah related.
The design is pretty cool, too. It's cool they found one that's so old. Especially from where it came from. Doesn't look that old, either. The second pic's of an etrog box, made by Piet Izak Cohen, out of silver and felt, Amsterdam, Netherlands; 1995. An etrog is a citrus fruit kind of similar to a lemon. We use it during Sukkot which recently ended. (It's an 8-day harvest holiday.) Some make jam out of them, and some let it shrivel up and use it as decoration. My mom would occasionally do the latter. They become really hard like rocks, and turn into a dark orangey color. (We had 2 sitting around for a few years.) We have a nice etrog box still. It's made out of a dark red wood, and has yellow/gold lettering and a design of an etrog on the top. The inside is lined with red velvet. It's been a long time since I've used it. This one's kind of a modern design, though. Looks like it's made in the shape of the fruit with loops as a handle. It has writing going down the sides of it. Not my style, but interesting to see.
The month-long holidays are: National Apple Month, National Caramel Month, National Cookie Month, National Dessert Month, National Pasta Month, National Pretzel Month, National Seafood Month, American Cheese Month, Bat Appreciation Month, Corn Month, German-American Heritage Month, Italian-American Heritage Month, LGBT History Month, National Cookbook Month, Polish-American Heritage Month, Sausage Month, Spinach Lovers Month. Some are for important causes, some are to make you appreciate things you may take for granted, and some are just for fun.
I've been sick for the past week.I started to feel like I had a bit of a scratchy throat that Wednesday night. That feeling happened at the tail end of going to a potluck/social thing with a support group. It just felt really scratchy the rest of the night. I didn't really cough, but it was a weird feeling.
The next day, it started to really hit me. I never had a fever during it, although my temp was unusually high for my norm. My 'norm' is around 96.2. I think my highest temp during it was like 98.9. Not really fever range.Had an extremely runny nose (I was going through tissues like crazy!
), face felt like it was on fire most of the time (my sinuses might have been full)
, headaches, sensitive to certain things in the air or light (couldn't really tell. But, my eyes became really watery after being out for a while one night), and general aches all over. I had one night where I couldn't stop coughing, but that was it.
Dad was sick a couple days before me. Hers seemed a bit different. She had a horrible hacking cough, and things progressed until she went to the ER. They told her she had acute bronchitis, and told her to have benadryl and, I think, some sort of inhaler. They kept asking if she had asthma. That's kind of scary in itself.She seems a lot better now. In fact, it seems to be out of her system. (Hopefully it is!)
I'm still slowly getting over mine. It feels like it's almost gone, but my nose is still weird (more stuffed up rather than runny, although it does occasionally get that way still. Sometimes it's hard to breathe with it while I'm eating or something. It's also very sore), my throat feels a tad sore, and I get slightly dizzy at times. I just want it to be totally gone already!
I think the reason why it's taking longer than usual, is because I've upped the dosage of azathioprine. That probably also helped with getting me sick in the first place. My immune system was already taking a hit from it. Interestingly, I got sick only about 8 days after starting this new dose...I've decided to keep track of when I get sick in the future, to see how common it'll be. I'm going to try to be a bit more diligent, but there's only so much you can do, and I have kind of a morbid fascination with it right now. I usually don't get sick that often. Maybe once a year. But, I've gone for years without being sick, too. So, I'm just not used to it.
I spent Yom Kippur at home, and joined services online. It was very interesting. Thought I wouldn't get much from watching it online, but I did. I also had a plethora of choices (services, study, talks, etc.) to choose from throughout the day. I only really paused to eat. Almost felt like it was more engaging this way. Also, some synagogues have really beautiful sanctuaries. Some congregations actually put handouts and prayer books up in a pdf file so the people watching can follow along. I might try out a different synagogue every Shabbat to see the ones I like the most. It's a handy tool for people who are immunosuppressed, live where there isn't a synagogue anywhere near them (one person commented that they watch every service at one of them, and they come from Germany. The nearest synagogue from where they are is at least an hour's drive. Cool to hear stories like that, and who they can help), etc.
Yizkor on Yom Kippur was a bit difficult to sit through. Yizkor is a memorial service. Essentially, it's for anyone who has lost a loved one. People share stories, there are poems, prayers, etc. Parts of it made me think of Mom, and every so often I thought maybe I should skip it, thinking it might be too much. But, I actually sat through the whole thing. The last time I went to a yizkor service was about a year after she passed. That was about 2 years ago. I remember walking out of that one about a third of the way into it. It was too much.
I went to my eye exam appointment today. The optometrist was kind of pushy. I was trying to fill out the paperwork, and she grabbed it from me. After some talking, I got it back and filled out most of it. My right contact lens has been bothering me for the last couple of days. It won't focus all the way. Things are really blurry in that eye. This makes the good side kind of overcompensate, leading to some headaches.It's been hard to watch TV sometimes because of it. Luckily, it was time for my annual exam again. Normally, I get an optometrist who's kind of a creepy old guy. This time it was a really pushy woman who wasn't listening to a thing I said.
There's never anyone who's 'normal', is there? We went in and started the exam with the cover one eye and tell me how far down the list you can read thing, then the other eye. My eyes seem to be really bad, because I couldn't read much passed the 3rd line with my left, and only some from the 2nd on my right. This was with my contacts in.
We had to stop a few minutes into that, because there was a problem with something, and I won't be able to have it done until next month. The optometrist said she could at least tell that I might need a different prescription. That's good to know that it's not just in my head. It's strange that it seemed to have only gotten weird the last couple of days, though. Makes me wonder if it's just the contacts themselves?
Oh, well. I guess I'll find out next month.
Lately, I've been trying to go back to bed early, again. It's helped a bit with getting over my cold. (There was one day that I spent most of it in bed, because I was feeling so horrible.) Also, feels nice to go to bed at a somewhat decent time. Yesterday I started up my sit-ups again. I'm doing 10 of them twice a day this time. Starting kind of light, since I'm not entirely out of the woods yet with my cold. Hoping to at least get one 2-mile walk in tomorrow. But, if I'm still sick and don't get to it, it'll be ok.
I've finished formatting my nightmare anthology. Now I just have to do the cover art before I send it off to be published. I might give the whole thing a once over one more time before I actually submit it.
I already have an idea of what I'll do for the cover art. I might use an old drawing of Max from my first novel (has no relation to this novel). He's a skeleton demon, and I have a drawing of just his head (or skull, however you want to look at it), and one of his entire body from head to toe. I might use his skull for a main part of it, and maybe take out a few of his other bones to scatter around it. I'm thinking of having kind of a dark blue color with a lighter color of cloud-like swirls in the background. Then, the title over it. Thinking of blending in the bones somehow. Just enough to still make them out. (Photoshop will be my friend throughout this...) This shall be another interesting project for it. I already have the parts, I just have to turn it into something. I also have some ideas of how to market it better than I did with the first one, and this one seems better all together than the other one. Certainly easier to explain, too.
